“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

Yesterday was a bad day. Well, let me first say that comments like that refer to me little world. Not necessarily the big-picture world. I don’t think I am the center of the universe by any means. But when I feel like I had a bad day, I’m gonna tell you.

I have been quite stressed out lately and yesterday was just the pinacle. The boys were crazy, I got about 1 hour of real work done all day, I still have no new work coming in (which is a whole big stress all in itself), I am SO FREAKING TIRED of piles of laundry and dishes on top of all the other stuff I have to worry about, and I was a cranky bee-otch. For reals.

It is a miracle He found me at all yesterday. And what’s worse, it makes me very sad to admit that I didn’t take any of my jank to Him. I sat in my sad little office (that I am going to have to give back to my husband — there’s another stress), I tried desperately to work, and I stewed in my stress.

I was so caught up in “me” that I didn’t even feel Him gently tapping on my shoulder all day… patiently waiting.

His patience always amazes and humbles me.

When I had to take all three boys to Wal-Mart with me (um, yeah — definitely another stress — how do these moms with 12 kids do it?) I gave in to a craving that I have had for about 3 days and bought some brownie mix. As I stood there trying to decide which box of gooey goodness I wanted, I saw that Godiva has come out with a mix. Mmmmm. Sounds good to me!

Yeah, I know what you are thinking, “She has no work coming in and no money and she bought brownies?” Yep. I am weak. Sorry.

I fed all the boys, cut their hair so they look snazzy on the first day of school, bathed them all, and then gave them each a gooey, delicious brownie for dessert. It wasn’t until I had them all tucked away in bed that I sat down to eat MY brownie (in front of my computer because I had more work to do).

Right there.

That’s where He found me.

I finally allowed myself to relax enough that I felt His gentle, patient tap on my shoulder and I was reminded of the verse above.

Not because I expect Him to make me a rich and famous photographer or graphic designer. But because, regardless of my stresses, He’s got my life under control. Regardless of how out of control I feel or how much I have to do today or tomorrow or next week, He has my plan all laid out!

I know a lot of people cling to this verse for the simple word “prosper”. Sure, prosperity would be great, but for me, it is more the last few words. “plans to give you hope and a future”

I sing the bridge from a Brooke Frasier song in my head all the time: “Hope is coming for me…. hope is coming for me…. hope is coming for me…. hope… He’s coming”

He’s coming.

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